despair – Blessed is She

You’re Going to Be Okay!

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Are you at a messy place right now and your mind wonders if God really does redeem our stories? Not just when we enter our heavenly home but here and now, this side of eternity? Maybe you have found yourself on a detour that you never saw coming. Maybe you are facing this very moment some ugly, difficult and untended parts of your story that have left you face down on the carpet desperate for God’s intervention.

Friend, can you just pause for a moment from your tears, your questions, your doubts and hang with me for a moment? Our. God. Is. Faithful. Always. I get it….. your circumstances may NOT be okay! However, YOU’RE going to be okay! How can I proclaim this so boldly and confidently? Because I have walked through those kind of chapters and am now reaping the joys that God brings as the pages turn.

The pain in my eyes that I had for literally years is now gone and has been replaced with precious peace and radical relief. God DOES redeem! He takes the worst parts of our stories and redeems and truly creates beauty from the ashes that may surround us.

“The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is on me, because the Lord has anointed me to preach good news to the poor. He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives, and release from darkness for the prisoners, to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor and the day of vengeance of our God, to comfort all who mourn, and provide for those who grieve in Zion – to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the Lord for the display of his splendor.” Is. 61:1-3

If you need hope this very moment please read the above scripture again. Pay attention to every word. Do you see it? Heavy words like brokenhearted, captive, darkness, prisoner, the grieving and all who mourn are the ones being addressed in this passage. Friend, if any of those words describe who you are or where you find yourself on this journey, your heart can be FULL of hope! You’re going to be okay!! Why? Because Jesus came for YOU! He has already made a way for you. Your ashes are no match for His abundant grace.

February 2, 2019 represents so much more than my wedding day…but a rescue of sorts. A day when God boldly declared to my heart as well as others that He is well able to redeem and take what the enemy meant to destroy me and my family and make it so beautiful. It represents the answer to countless prayers prayed by many that I did not even know were praying for me and my family. You see, it’s not just our victory in Jesus but other’s victory and testimony, too! Those who loved us, supported us, believed in us and more importantly those who believed that God had good plans for us in spite of how it looked then. My heart is so thankful. My prayer is that in sharing this it will give YOU a shot of hope because at numerous times, I was wondering and struggling, too! Broken, wounded, stressed to the hilt, and ever so desperate. It wasn’t just one hard thing but many that left me with eye twitches and stress rashes…..but God! No, things did not happened as I had prayed but God took me on a path that has been paved with amazing grace and beauty for ashes. If you are wondering if this could ever happen for you my answer to you is a resounding and confident YES!!! It is so hard to believe when your heart is filled with pain and you can’t see clearly for the fog that surrounds you. I get it. I really do. I promise you, our God is faithful. He sees you. He invites you to trust Him as He is working out the future that He has for you and those you love.

So my friend, whatever chapter you are in know this; it’s only for a season. Many times we have no control how long our painful seasons may last but you can be assured that God’s timing is perfect and purposeful. You, my friend, are on the pathway to greater joy and intimacy with Christ than you have ever known. Stay on the carpet, ugly cry and let your knees burn. Don’t ever stop wrestling. Stubbornly hold on to your faith as you hold on to your God. Follow hard after him…stay obedient no matter what your feelings tell you. Expect God to move! He will sweet sister, He will!! Your waiting time is not wasted time…He is creating room in you for the beauty that is yet to come! One day, you will see clearly that He not one time left you in your darkest moments. He was cutting away the lies from the past to make room for a NEW season, a NEW beginning that could not compare to anything you have experience before.

Psalm 27:14

Wait and hope for and expect the Lord; be brave and of good courage and let your heart be stout and enduring. Yes, wait for and hope for and expect the lord.

How Will They Know?

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Deuteronomy 32:3

I will PROCLAIM the name of the Lord. Oh, praise the greatness of our God!

If you have known the Lord for anytime at all, you have, no doubt, experienced the greatness of our God. Since the day of your salvation, God has been writing your story. A story FULL of His divine, amazing grace. What has God done since that day? What storms has He calmed? What wounds has He healed? Are you proclaiming His greatness? Somebody needs to hear about the faithfulness of your God….somebody this very minute needs hope.

Think about it……….

How will the mom who has lost her precious baby know that He is the God of all comfort?

How will the wife whose husband left after many years of marriage know that He is the God that will never leave her nor forsake her?

How will the man who is bound by addiction find out that He is the God of deliverance and freedom?

How will the couple on the brink of divorce find out that He is the God of restoration and redemption?

How will the parents who are utterly devastated by the choices their child is making find the strength and courage to continue to pray and believe for divine intervention?

How will the woman who has just went through the brokenness of divorce find that her identity is not defined by her marital status but in who Christ says she is?

How will the man who feels he is at the end of his rope find hope and hear about Jesus dying on the cross for his salvation?

How will the lady who has just been diagnosed with cancer find faith to believe that Jesus is her healer?

How will the woman who aborted her baby and is now consumed with regret and shame find out the He is the God of abundant mercy and love?

How will the father who has lived a life of regrets and shame find out that He is the God of forgiveness and new beginnings?

How will the girl who feels she can never measure up and therefore, wants to give up, find that she is fearfully and wonderfully made…created by God who loves her completely and unconditionally?

I could go on and on with regards to life and the gut-wrenching things that people face day in and day out. Life is hard! This world needs HOPE. This world needs you to share the HOPE that has brought you through!

Jesus walks with us through the wilderness of pain, loss, rejection, and brokenness not only to transform us into His likeness and to heal us but so that others can be transformed and healed, as well.

Here is what I have found to be true. Broken people can confide in a Pastor for prayer and wisdom, which is very beneficial and recommended. They can go to a Godly, licensed counselor to help facilitate healing and wholeness, which is absolutely wise and proactive. They can share their pain with a friend which will bring great comfort to their hurting heart. But there is nothing like hearing God’s story of redemption and hope from someone who KNOWS what it is like to go through what you are experiencing.

I understand this first hand. The years of betrayal leading up to my divorce left my heart broken and full of loneliness and even shame, at times. For so long, within my close circle of friends, there was no one who had experienced what I was going through. Though they were so very kind and gracious, they couldn’t really understand my pain. When God finally brought someone into my life who had been where I was and was willing to share her own story, I found hope like I hadn’t had before. I devoured every word she had to say….I knew she understood me. The LIES that the enemy had been shouting to my wounded heart were exposed. I wasn’t the only ONE who ever faced this. I was NOT alone. My feelings were NOT crazy! God was STILL with me! Truth brought some bright hope to my darkness that day because one dear sister was willing to be transparent about her past and God was glorified.

Dear friend, our painful and messy lives can be used to proclaim God’s powerful message to the hurting!

Part of me wants to passionately ask…how can we NOT tell them? How can we not tell about how God gave us hope when we had none? How He saved, healed, redeemed, restored and delivered? How can we possibly keep silent when God has been so abundantly gracious to us?

Lord, thank You for Your amazing and precise grace that has saved us and brought us victoriously through our most darkest and unwanted seasons. May we boldly proclaim your goodness! Help us to bravely allow our struggles, brokenness, and pain to be used to bring GLORY and HONOR to your name. Amen!!

2 Corinthians 1:4 He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us.

He Gets Me!

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The Lord is good, a Strength and Stronghold in the day of trouble; He knows (recognizes, has knowledge of, and understands) those who take refuge and trust in Him. Nahum 1:7

I am so very grateful that God gets me. He understands me. Lately, I have found great comfort in knowing this. Not to justify or make excuses for my messiness but to find the grace and strength to expect change. I can’t do it without Him, nor do I have to! Thank you, Jesus! He knows why I am the way I am. He has witnessed my brokenness. He understands my insecurities. He understands why I am so messy! A toxic marriage and now divorce have left their ugly marks and I sometimes get frustrated with the depth of those marks. Ugh! I am good at justifying and downplaying red flags. I question my own intuition. I struggle with insecurities. I sometimes carry the burden and responsibility of the choices and consequences of other’s upon myself. Please tell me I am not the only one? Oh, and there is more…Ha! The truth is, we can get upset and frustrated about our own weaknesses and struggles OR we can thank God that we recognize them and allow Him to turn our weaknesses into strengths that will glorify and honor him.

Transformation is more often than not, an intense and long process. Unfortunately, short cuts cannot be taken. Old mind sets can take a while to rewire. It takes work. It takes discipline. It takes a whole lot of grace. However, we need not allow our struggles define us. We have a loving Father who patiently and kindly reveals, heals, and makes new. He is so eminently patient with us and FULL of grace. He WILL complete the good work he started in you and in me. He loves each of us way too much to allow stinkin’ thinking and past survivor- mode- mindsets to continue to hold us hostage. He wants us free and He will not relent until that happens.

Today, I choose to surrender wholly to Him all my inconsistencies, all my insecurities, all my stinkin’ thinkin’, all my fears and all of my messiness. The truth is, life will continue to have its messiness in one way or another, which means more messiness in me to work through, ha! Therefore, this will, by no means, be a one time event, but an ongoing need throughout this journey. AND that’s okay because as long as you and I continue to surrender and replace lies with Truth, the devil can’t win and we are truly made MORE than conquerors through our Savior who love us! Amen!?

How about you? Aren’t you glad that God gets YOU? You don’t have to invite discouragement to be your companion because you are still struggling to overcome. The Lord understands. Let me remind you that He has walked with you through your most darkest seasons. He has witnessed all that your heart has gone through. He has seen the well of tears that you have cried when nobody was looking. He is fully aware of your knee jerk reactions to certain situations because of your past. He knows that you want to be free and the good news is… He reveals only to heal, sweet sister! He is the Master Potter who re-forms, re-shapes and chisels away those unwanted rough and sharp edges that are placed in His hands of mercy. As the scripture says, “The Lord is good, a Strength and Stronghold in the day of trouble…” Think about that! He is GOOD! He is your STRENGTH and He is your STRONGHOLD in the midst or your troubled heart. “He knows (recognizes, has knowledge of, and understands) those who take refuge and trust in Him.” Rest in that, my dear sister knowing that you are understood and that your God GETS you and even MORE profound than that is that He’s GOT you! Friend, remain on the Potter’s wheel and your beauty will shine forth as you encounter your happily-even-after days ahead! Believe it!

The word that came to Jeremiah from the Lord: “Arise, and go down to the potter’s house, and there I will let you hear my words.”So I went down to the potter’s house, and there he was working at his wheel. And the vessel he was making of clay was spoiled in the potter’s hand, and he reworked it into another vessel, as it seemed good to the potter to do. Jeremiah 18:1-4